


Urd and Xehanorts embarassing escapade

by EpicXemnasman



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, Game: Kingdom Hearts Dark Road, Shitpost Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:07:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29096262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EpicXemnasman/pseuds/EpicXemnasman
Relationships: Xehanort/Urd (Kingdom Hearts)
Kudos: 1





	Urd and Xehanorts embarassing escapade

It was new years eve in Scala Ad Caelum and the excitement in the air was so thick that one could almost taste it. Bragi and Hermod were laughing about god knows what, and Vor was droning on about what her new years resolution was to a very intrigued Eraqus and a very pissed off Xehanort. The only reason the silver haired boy hadn't let his anger out at the small girl was because the last person who made Vor cry was forced to skinny dip in an ice cold pool. However everybody had forgiven Eraqus and he had made sure to be extra nice to Vor since that incident. Baldr was nowhere to be found. He was probably sleeping in a dark storage room somewhere. Urd was also in the room, but she was too busy to talk to any of her classmates. She was working on a very awesome new years firework which was infused with blizzard magic. Since snow was rare in Scala Ad Caelum, Urd figured her classmates would appreciate it. 

"I'm eager to see the final result of your project Urd." Came a voice from behind her. She turned round to find Xehanort standing there, a slightly amused grin on his face. "Are you sure you don't want any help?" he continued. "I'm sure it'd give you a chance to have a break! Besides, it's new years eve! Why not spend some time with us? Vor would certainly be happy." Xehanort looked round and saw Vor laughing as Eraqus sang 'don't think twice' while wearing some goofy paper crown and his keyblade armour. Urd giggled which prompted Xehanort to turn to face her. 

"Y'know Xehanort. There is something you could help me with." She said. Xehanort inclined his head. 

"Do tell" he said with a grin. 

"I want to set the firework off at exaclty 12:00 AM but i don't want the message to fade immediately. I want it to linger for at least a little while, and since you have a knack for time magic, I thought maybe you could use some of your skills to freeze it in the sky!" She explained. Xehanort made a 'hm' noise and then smiled. 

"Of course!" He said. "I'm glad I'm able to assist you." The silver haired boy said. "Well then!" He exclaimed, putting his hand on Urd's shoulder. "Let's get to work!"

*A FEW HOURS LATER*

It's now 11:55pm. Urd, Xehanort and all their classmates (minus Baldr) were standing by the lake. Urd looked over at Xehanort, who gave her a smile and a nod which the girl returned happily. Despite all of Xehanort's promises, Urd felt butterflies in her stomach. Xehanort seemed to notice this and took her hand. Urd gave a tiny squeak of surprise and her face turned slightly red. "It's okay." Xehanort assured her. 

"It'll work. I promise." Suddenly a tiny squeal of joy sounded from something behind them. Xehanort and Urd spun round to see Vor standing there, her eyes wide and her mouth slightly agape. "How long were you standing there?" Xehanort asked, releasing Urds hands. 

"Not long!" Vor said happily. "I was just wandering around and I saw you two lovebirds!" Xehanort raised an eyebrow. 

"Lovebirds? You've been spending too much time with Eraqus." He said with a chuckle. Urd's face was bright red. 

"W-We're not d-dating or anything if that's what you're implying Vor!" She said quickly. The smaller girl giggled and replied 

"I know! It's just weird seeing Xehanort get physical with somebody!" This comment made Xehanorts face turn the tiniest shade of pink. He frowned. 

"Vor, I think Eraqus might be looking for you. After all, you know how he gets when he has nobody to...get physical with." He said. Vor's face turned scarlet and she was making failed attempts to retort when Eraqus showed up. He was; for lack of a better word, hammered. 

"Eraqus, how many Elixirs have you been through?" Xehanort asked. Eraqus looked at him and said with a drawl: 

"Eleventy four." The young keyblade wielder then noticed Urds firework. "I think that would make a good president." Before summoning his keyblade and lighting the blizzard experts project. 

"No Eraqus wait!" Urd shouted, but it was too late. Eraqus had activated the firework and it launched into the sky. Luckily at that exact moment the clock struck 12 and the new year began. The firework exploded into a storm of snow and thanks to Xehanorts time magic, the message "HAPPY NEW YEAR!" was left hanging in the sky for all to see for at least 20 minutes. Urd and Xehanort looked at each other and smiled. It was over. 

*A FEW HOURS LATER*

Urd was in Vors room, sitting on a chair and reading the girl a bedtime story. Urd had no clue why Vor loved them so much, but she figured that if it made her friend happy then she'd do it. Vor always considered Urd to be like a big sister to her and Urd was happy to fill that role. 

"And so, the two bunnies escaped the mean hunters and were able to go back to their house, where they were able to cuddle their babies once again. The end." Urd finished the story and placed the book down on Vors bedside table. "Did you enjoy that?" She asked, smiling. Vor nodded enthusiastically. 

"I liked the part where they tripped the hunters up with the big carrot!" She said happily. Urd giggled. 

"I liked that part too." She replied. She stood up to leave, but Vor suddenly grabbed her hand. "What's wrong?" she asked. 

"Please don't go" Vor said. The look in Vors eyes both concerned and frightened Urd. 

"Is everything okay Vor?" She said, sitting back down. "Please tell me." Vor seemed to calm down a bit, and said 

"I woke up yesterday and I couldn't move. There was a man in my room with a black coat on. He had a really deep voice and he told me that nobody was coming to save me. He had a red blade in his hand, and he was going to hurt me with it. But then I could move again and he was gone. I don't want him to come back and hurt me because if I'm on my own nobody can protect me." She explained, tears welling up in her eyes. Urd hugged her friend. She knew what it was Vor had gone through. Sleep paralysis. Urd had only had it once, but that one experience was horrible. She couldn't move, or talk. All she could do was hope the boy in the strange helmet wouldn't attack her. She took Vors tiny hand in her own and said 

"I can't stay with you Vor. But if you feel scared, you can come to my room for a while. Deal?" Vor nodded and then hugged her. 

"Thank you." The girl said quietly, before laying back down and cuddling her stuffed lion. Urd stepped out of the room and headed to her own. Upon entering the bedroom, she removed her clothes and changed into her snowflake themed pyjamas before lying down in bed. Unfortunately for Urd, the amount of fireworks being set off by her classmates was making it impossible to sleep. '𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘉𝘢𝘭𝘥𝘳'𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨' she thought to herself before getting out of bed and turning on the TV Bragi had won in a gambling match. She then proceeded to turn on the Nintendo Switch that Eraqus had given her for christmas. Urd didn't play video games much, but she couldn't sleep, but didn't want to leave her room. Since really couldn't be bothered to be around Eraqus' drunken self. She decided to play Super Smash Bros Ultimate. After a few rounds, she looked out of the window and saw that her 'happy new year!' message still hung high in the sky. She smiled at this. 

"It was sweet of Xehanort to help, but he might have gone overboard with the time magic." Urd said to herself. "Still. I should do probably do something to thank him. " 

*MEANWHILE IN HERMODS ILLEGAL POTION MAKING LABORATORY*

"Hermod, what the hell is this place?" Bragi asked. Hermod laughed. 

"It's where people get high class potions which can serve any purpose!" The blue haired wielder said. "And I mean ANY purpose. From healing to knocking people the hell out." Bragi whistled. 

"So this is how you've been getting all that munny huh?" This caused Hermod to grin. 

"Yep! And I've made a brand new, never before seen potion!" Bragi narrowed his eyes. 

"Do you know what it does?" He asked. Hermod nodded. "I tested it on myself! And my god it was wonderful. But I want to see the affect it has on other people." Bragi frowned. 

"Don't tell me I'm your next test subject." He said, which caused Hermod to burst out in laughter. "Of course not!" the blue haired boy said between laughs. "Xehanort is!" 

*ABOUT 20 MINUTES LATER" 

"Hermod? What is this?" Xehanort asked looking completely perplexed. 

"Don't worry about it!" Hermod said happily. Bragi had done as he asked and retrieved Xehanort for him. Now Bragi was god knows where. Hermod had added some food colouring to the blood red potion which now made it a nice shade of green. It looked just like a regular healing potion now. Hermod handed this potion to Xehanort, who looked at him suspiciously. "What is this?" The silver haired boy asked. Hermod held his hands up. 

"An upgraded healing potion!" He said innocently. "It permanently increases your strength!" He could tell Xehanort didn't quite believe him, but took a sip of the potion nonetheless. Xehanort then paused, his eyes widening. He then chugged down the rest of it. 

"Not bad." He said, grinning. "What's up?" He then asked, seeing Hermods face which had gone completely pale. 

"That was the only one." He said. 

"Well, I'm sure you can make another one." Xehanort replied. "Well, I best be off. I have other matters to attend to." He said, before walking out of the room. Hermod simply watched the other boy leave, his mouth slightly agape. 

"What the fuck have I done." He muttered to himself. 

*5 MINUTES LATER*

Xehanort was walking through a corridor, heading towards his room when he felt something tighten around his groin. He stopped and looked down. There was a noticeable bulge in his pants. He raised an eyebrow. He had no idea what the hell was going on. He'd never had anything like this happen to him before and was curious about what was going on. He decided he should ask somebody about this and he realized Urd's room was closest. And so Xehanort went to knock on his friends door. 

Urd was in the process of drinking a cup of tea when she heard a knock at her bedroom door. 

"Just a second!" she said, before setting her tea down on her bedside table and standing up. She opened her door and was elated to see Xehanort standing there. "Xehanort!" She said happily. "How nice of you to drop in!" Xehanort smiled warmly. But there was something odd about it. His face had a reddish tinge to it. Was he feeling okay? 

"Hello Urd." Xehanort said. "Would it be okay if I come in?" He asked politely. Urd smiled before replying 

"Of course!" and proceeded to step aside. Xehanort tentatively stepped in, trying to make his 'problem' as bearable as possible. "Please sit down!" Urd said brightly "I'll get you some tea!" She then proceeded to move to her kettle to make a second cup of tea for her friend. Meanwhile, Xehanort sat down on her bed and tried to make his 'problem' as incospicuous as he could. But unfortunately for the silver haired boy, that turned out to be quite the task in his current position. Urd brought the tea over to him and held the cup out. Xehanort took the tea and stared at it. Urd sat next to him, sipping her tea. Xehanort noticed she was constantly glancing at him. The two sat in silence for a good 2 minutes before Urd broke the ice. 

"Is everything okay Xehanort?" She asked. "You haven't touched your tea at all!" Xehanort shifted uncomfortably before replying 

"It's fine Urd. My apologies." He slowly lifted the cup up and brought it to his mouth before taking a sip. He looked at Urd who, thankfully hadn't noticed the bulge in his pants. He quickly set the cup back down between his legs. He noticed Urd watching him with an expectant face. 

"So how is it?" She asked. Xehanort gave her a small smile. 

"It's excellent Urd. As always." He said warmly. Urd was overjoyed. 

"Thank you!" She said happily. "I always worry that when I make things, they don't impress people or they don't make people happy and it's really...really..." She trailed off, a look of concern on her face. "Xehanort what's wrong?" She asked. Xehanort was shifting uncomfortably, moving his legs close together and then moving them apart. He was trying to keep his face impassive but was failing. 

"N-nothing, I'm fine." The silver haired boy said, his face reddening. Urd wasn't convinced, and scooched closer to her friend. "Xehanort please tell me what's wrong. I want to make sure you're okay." Xehanort looked at her and saw the concern in her eyes. He sighed and said 

"Well, the reason I came here in the first place was because I wanted to ask you something." Urd's face became one of curiosity. 

"Oh?" She said. Xehanort seemed to make a descision in his head and said "I wanted to ask you about this." He moved the cup from between his legs revealing a sizeable lump in his pants. Urd's face turned pink and her mouth opened slightly. 

"X-Xehanort, do you know what that is?" she asked. Xehanort shook his head. Urd frowned. "Seriously? You've been alive for 18 years and you don't know what an erection is?" She said incredulously. Now it was Xehanorts turn to frown. 

"I don't focus on such things." He said plainly. Urd giggled. 

"I thought you'd say something like that!" She said. 

"So what is it?" Xehanort asked. Urd pouted. 

"Do I really have to explain? Okay then. When a guy is aroused, blood rushes to the penis, which makes it hard." She explained, feeling her face reddening. Xehanort raised an eyebrow. 

"Arousal?" He asked. Urd gave a slightly amused sigh and continued the explanation. 

"Arousal is the feeling of being turned on sexually. When you're turned on, your body experiences physical and emotional changes. Your penis or clitoris may get erect, which means hard, engorged, and sensitive, and you may feel wetness on your vulva or vagina, or on the tip of your penis." This caused Xehanort to narrow his eyes slightly. 

"What was all of that about vaginas?" He asked. "Last time I checked, I'm not a girl." Urd's face turned even redder. To be perfectly honest she was feeling pretty aroused herself. 

"No reason!" She said innocently. "I just figured it'd be best for you to understand both definitions!" She continued, shifting nervously. Xehanort chuckled and moved closer to her. He then proceeded to put his arms around her. "X-Xehanort what are you doing?" She said, sweat trickling down the back of her neck as Xehanort arms tightened around her stomach. 

"Hugging you. What does it look like?" He replied, grinning. He then pressed his entire body against his friend which caused her to squeak in surprise. 

"Xehanort, I haven't done that much to warrant this. I appreciate it alot but you're making me fe-" The rest of Urd's words were cut off by Xehanort pressing his mouth against hers. "Mmmm?!" Was the noise that came out of her mouth. Xehanort pushed her down onto her bed. He then proceeded to lay down next to her. Urd's face was scarlet. "Xehanort, I don't understand. I mean, I enjoyed that very much but why did you decide to do that?" She asked. Xehanort chuckled. 

"Honestly, I just thought it was appropriate." He replied, as he began to hug Urd again. She giggled softly before wrapping her arms around him. Suddenly, her eyes widened as she gave a squeak of surprise. One of Xehanort's hands were resting on her butt. 

"Xehanort?" She asked. Xehanort then placed one of the fingers of his other hand on her lips. 

"Is it okay if I do that?" He asked. Urd nodded. She then felt something else. Xehanorts other hand was gliding up her snowflake themed pyjama top and moving towards her breasts. When his hand finally reached her breasts, he began to squeeze them gently, which caused Urd to moan. He then proceeded to use his other hand to pull down her pyjama shorts, exposing all of her lower regions. Xehanort then proceeded to take his hands off Urds ass and remove his own trousers. Urd looked at his full length. She gulped. 

"Xehanort, please be gentle." She said. Xehanort grinned mischeviously before thrusting into her, tearing past her hymen and taking her verginity almost immediately. Urd cried out, tears welling up in her eyes as her friend thrust into her again and again. "Xehanort please! Be gentle!" She begged but he didn't seem to listen. Urd could see his dick poking out in her lower stomach. "F-fuck!" She yelled. "Xehanort I'm going to-Ah-Ahhhhhhh!" Urd moaned as she reached her climax. Xehanort however wasn't done yet. He continued to thrust into her, and began to feel his own climax welling up. He thrusted faster, and faster and finally, with one last thrust he came deep into Urd's womb. Unfortunately for the two keyblade wielders, the door flew open just as Xehanort came, and in stepped Vor. Xehanort and Urd both jumped as Vor gave a tiny shriek of surprise. 

"Vor?" Urd yelled. "What are you doing in here?" Vor, who had turned scarlet began to stammer 

"I was feeling scared and you said I could come in here to talk to you if I did!" The small keyblade wielder responded, trying not to look. Urd and Xehanort exchanged a look, and Urd gave him a sheepish grin. 

"I did say she could." The white haired girl said as Xehanort chuckled. Vor was covering her eyes now. Tomorrow was going to be...interesting for the trio.


End file.
